101 useless facts about me
101 totally useless facts about me
1. I never understood these facts lists I keep seeing on everybody’s blogs and only decided to write one because it means additional content on my blog and hopefully another page that I can SEO.
2. As a child I always thought I was adopted because I felt so different to my 2 sisters.
3. I am definitely my parents’ child – My mother has tiny earlobes, my father has large earlobes, my eldest sister has tiny earlobes and my other sister has large earlobes while I have one of each – I shit you not.
4. I sucked at school and failed std 9 and matric even though I have a well above average IQ
5. I found out in my 30′s that I have adult ADD – certainly explained a lot.
6. I studied Aeronautical Engineering for a brief period.
7. I once had long hair down to the middle of my back
8. I failed every single subject in Std 9 first year – 5 H’s and 1 G. My report card looked like a Christmas tree.
9. I did my national service as a signaller in the Signals Corps. (Signals is code for “Electronic Warfare” Electronic Warfare is code for “Spy”)
10. I spent 23 days in an army lockup and did an additional 21 days active duty for assaulting a corporal
11. I rewrote matric exams while waiting in Pretoria to be court martialled. I was given study leave and passed. Yes I have a matric.
12. I kinda like the fact that I am going a bit grey.
13. I would wear contact lenses but I have dry eyes from sitting 15 hours a day in front of a PC.
14. I worked for Microsoft for a short time, I wanted to get into IT for as long as I can remember, now that I work in IT I want out.
15. I have a mate who emigrated to the US a couple of years back, we only realized each other’s love for poker after he left for the US and we probably chat more now than we did when he lived in SA. I <3 you Wade!
16. I prefer firefox over IE
17. I carry around business cards that have the wrong office number on them – at least the cell phone number is right.
18. In my wallet I carry a few photos; 2 of my son, 1 of my neice, another of my nephew and 1 of myself and my late cousin.
19. My best friend, big brother, anchor, teacher, cousin and all round favourite person, in the whole world, Ricky Delgado, was shot and killed 7 years ago – I still miss him very much. I always envied Ricky – I wanted to be just like him.
20. We once got into a physical fight at my gran’s house many years ago and at my mother’s birthday an argument between us nearly came to blows again. It was the only 2 times we ever fought seriously in 20 something years.
21. I started smoking cigarettes because I wanted to be just like Ricky. I smoked weed because I wanted to be just like Ricky.
22. I’ve been engaged twice, once for 5 years and the 2nd time for 6 weeks to 2 different women.
23. One of my best jols EVER was going to the camel experience dressed as Darth Vader / an alien with silver hair. I think about that night often.
24. I secretly enjoy watching WWE wrestling with my son. My father too.
25. I have 3 TV’s at home and DSTV and only ever watch 1 channel, 393 the poker channel.
26. I pretty much tried every drug imaginable as a curious teen other than stick a needle in my veins – I can honestly say that I have never been any kind of a substance addict. I had fun then packed it away. Pity some of my friends couldn’t.
27. My childhood hero was Ruud Gullit – the dutch striker that played for AC Milan.
28. I lived in Hawaii for 3 months in 1993 and hated it.
29. I once represented Vodacom at the annual brain Olympics.
30. I once tried to teach myself how to speak Japanese – now all I remember is “Birra ni hong honigai shimus” – 2 bottles of beer please.
31. I don’t drink beer – in fact I detest beer, if I do HAVE to drink a beer, I’ll drink a corona or a millers.
32. I then tried to teach myself how to speak Mandarin and all I remember is “Ni ghoi shwa yingwin ma?” – Do you speak English?
33. I used to practise my Mandarin on a colleague. He was a black Mozambiquan who was raised in China – fluent in Portuguese and Mandarin.
34. I am not a huge drinker of alcoholic beverages, I’ll settle for a coke any day of the week over a beer or glass of wine, but when I wanna get a bit tanked, I like scotch. Johnny Walker, Bells or Jamesons. Preferrably on the rocks in a tall glass with lots of ice.
35. I got smashed off my face when I flew to the US on cognac and coke (hey it’s just like klippies and coke, only better) I passed out and slept like a baby all the way to New York.
36. I love a good joke. The dirtier the better.
38. I take lunch at pretty much the same time every day with the same 2 characters and we pretty much always have the same thing – Schwarmas!
39. I have a collection of over 10 000 mp3′s. I started collecting in 1999.
40. I don’t have an ipod – I have an iphone but hardly use it for music. I also have a funky little samsung mp3 player that in my opinion does the job. Sure its only 2 gigs but whoever listens to more music than that in 1 sitting needs to get a life.
41. I’m no slave to fashion – I dress comfortably, not fashionably.
42. I am however picky when it comes to shoes. I like good shoes, like nike.
43. I once quit smoking for a year because of a girl.
44. I started again a year later because of the same girl.
45. My favourite movie of 2008 has to be “Young People Fucking” and no its not a porn – it’s a comedy.
46. I deliberately left out Number 37 to see if you would notice.
47. I bet you went back to take a look didn’t you?
48. I know that was lame, but I am running out of shit to say.
37. ok here’s 37 – I am very much into SEO and anything to do with Search Engines – I taught myself what I know.
49. I have something like 7 or 8 Netgear adsl routers lying in my garage, none of them work.
50. My greatest personal dream is to play in the world series of poker and I know I will achieve this dream within the next 3 – 5 years.
51. I was bored so I decided to make this list 100 and not 50.
52. My parents got divorced when I was 18, they still talk today and even team up to play cards at family gatherings.
53. Both my parents enjoy telling jokes, I reckon that’s where I got my sense of humour from.
54. I skydived once. Would do it again any day. It was a tandem jump from 30 000 feet with 50 seconds of freefall.
55. I’ve also bungied. On a dare I did a backward somersault out of the bungy cage at the Rand Show a few years ago.
56. My son enjoys telling jokes too. He cracks me up sometimes.
57. I get obsessed with certain things, like poker, I got obsessed. I am currently obsessed with my blog. I am trying to make it all lekker, I have over 60 active plugins for various things.
58. I often tell my son that he is allergic to cigarette smoke, and that he will die if he smokes. Hopefully this will deter him from ever smoking.
59. I have watched every single episode of Smallville, all 7 seasons. I always have been and always will be a comic hero junkie.
60. I have also watched every single episode of Lost, Heroes, Weeds, Supernatural, Dexter, The Unit, Jericho and My name is Earl.
61. My favourite director is Kevin Smith, I have watched every Kevin Smith movie ever made, Jay & silent Bob are my favourite degenerates.
62. My favourite pizza is a Savas Special from Mimmos in Rosebank, it’s Ham, Grilled Haloumi Cheese, fresh tomato and Avo.
63. My son and I both support Manchester United.
64. My first fight at school was with a redhead kid by the name of Jeffery Bouwer, I have no idea what the fight was about.
65. My standard 4 maths teacher also taught my nephew maths, nearly 25 years after she taught me.
66. Despite spending hours upon hours on the internet, I don’t surf, browse or watch porn. Frankly, it bores me and I think it desensitizes sex to the point where you eventually have to take a dump on your partner’s chest to get your rocks off. That or get intimate with a hosepipe. Don’t ask me, ask the curly haired girl from Durban about that one….
67. I do however collect photos of beautiful, good looking but fully clothed women. I post them at http://www.stunning-babes.com
68. I’ve been chatting on various IRC networks for close on 10 years. My mates and I started our own network, we joined another network, had a few hundred chatters then gave it up. We used to host Highveld 94.7′s official chatroom.
69. Some of my closest friends today are people I met online. I met Ian Barnes on irc, we’ve been mates for a long time and now work for the same company.
70. Ian is the only friend I have that has a child of their own, most of my friends shacked up with women who had kids from previous relationships. Can’t blame them really, instant family, no need to change nappies.
71. Once a month, with one full tank of diesel I try and see how far I can push my car on a single tank.
I drive conservatively and even freewheel downhills to save juice. My last tank got me almost 900 km on a single 55L tank.
72. The money I save lands up going to pay speeding fines when I am not trying to see how far I can push my car on a single tank of petrol.
73. I once got a speeding fine for R1400. I was caught on camera doing 180 km in a 100 zone. This was about 12 years ago. If that had been today, they’d have locked me up.
74. I have a tattoo of Garfield and had a nipple ring. I removed the piercing after a few years and today only wear a small diamond stud in my left ear.
75. My sisters used to run away and hide from me as a kid.
76. When they weren’t hiding from me, they were picking on me.
77. To get them off my case, I used to go into their rooms and take things from the one’s bedroom and put it in the other’s bedroom so that they would fight and leave me alone. It worked.
78. I once poured glue into my one sister’s jewelery box.
79. She’s never let me forget it.
80. I can’t remember my dreams. The only dreams I can remember over the last few years are dreams of my late cousin Ricky.
81. I learnt to play a few tunes on a piano by ear. We had a baby grand at home growing up, and although my sister went for lessons, I was the only one who could play. Ballade for Adeline, Fur Elize, chopsticks, Axel F, Hava Nagila, we are the world and a few Portuguese folk songs.
82. I once tried to write my own song. It sucked ass.
83. I considered my best friend to be my late cousin Ricky. The person I consider to be my best friend today is also Ricky.
84. I have a kak voice but I sing in my car in traffic.
85. My son gives me the evil eye when I do. But its ok for him to sing along to snoop dogg.
86. I have a very very open taste in music, I enjoy classic rock ballads the most but am not adverse to classical, jazz, blues, opera, metal, dance, hip-hop, rave, house, rock, acoustic, reggae, soul or love songs.
87. I am not really racist, I am just intolerant of ignorance. My favourite black friend is a dude by the name of Teboho Fokane. He is a full blown racist and I once heard him swear taxi drivers.
He is also a fair poet and writer. His stuff is good.
88. I am really anal about making sure that my blog is 100% XHTML and CSS compliant.
89. I used to read alot of horror fiction by writers like Stephen King and Dean Koontz, these days I read alot of poker books.
90. Daniel Negreanu is my favourite poker player.
91. I love staring at my son when he is preoccupied with something, watching him live is an experience all of its own for me.
92. He often tries to prank me by turning the seat heater on for the driver seat in my car.
93. I drive a 2 liter golf TDi. I love my car. No really I do. I had 2 drunk women in my car one night, one thought it was a hyundai, the other spilled half a bottle of my colonge half inside her handbag and half onto my carpet. I couldn’t drive anywhere for 2 weeks after that without giggling at the thought of the 2 of them.
94. I clench my jaws and grind my teeth way too much. I think it’s my body’s way of burning off nervous energy.
95. I have small hands for a guy
96. They good at massaging. Dunno where I learnt it from but I am able to loosten tight muscles and knots quite quickly.
97. I collect peaked caps. I have no idea how many I have, they are all over my house. I keep a few in my car.
98. Ever since I started playing poker, I have invested in hooded jackets. I have 6 or 7 different ones.
99. I shave my own head, but i now have a full head of hair.
100. I have 1 female friend who I consider to be my best female friend, we chat every day and have for the last 5 years or so, but we have never met. We met on IRC. She’s happily married and we’ll probably never ever meet but she brings joy to my world.
101. My favourite starting hand in holdem are the 2 black Aces, the ace of spades and the ace of clubs. Despite the fact that aces are the best starting hand in holdem, I cannot ever recall losing with 2 black ones.