Rock Paper Scissors

I understand that scissors can beat paper, and I get how rock can beat scissors, but there is no way paper can beat rock.
Paper is supposed to magically “wrap around” rock, rendering it immobile?
Why can’t paper do this to scissors?
Forget scissors, why can’t paper do this to people?

Why aren’t sheets of notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class?
I’ll tell you why– BECAUSE PAPER CAN’T BEAT UP ANYBODY! A rock would tear it up in 2 seconds.

When I play rock/paper/scissors, I always choose rock.
Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper,
I punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say,
“Oh, I’m sorry. I thought paper would protect you.”

Sep 25th, 2005 | Posted in Rants
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  1. Sep 25th, 2005 at 07:14 | #1

    Seems reasonable. *chuckles*

  2. Sep 26th, 2005 at 01:30 | #2

    Rock, paper, scissors is so old school. This is 2005.

  3. Jan 23rd, 2007 at 04:03 | #3

    hi yes paper beats rock and i can see what you are saying so change it to hammer better but then how do scissors beat hammer u change that human there you go human best player lol aswered

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